The last two weeks have been a Rollercoaster of emotions and planning, re-planning and throwing all the plans out the window again.
As I’ve talked about before, I had extensive imaging of my whole body done at the beginning of 2021. All of those results came back very reassuring. No new growths, the ones we knew about hadn’t changed much. All in all we could only jump up and down and thank God for such good news.
Fast forward to 2 weeks ago. I have had this upper right abdominal pain for a while. When I thought back, it started the last couple months of my pregnancy. At that point I just assumed it was pregnancy related since Luke’s feet were right in that area and he kept kicking me in the ribs. So… no big deal.
After birth, I noticed the pain stayed. It wasn’t constant or anything and also not debilitating. It was more of a 1-2 days kind of pain that would be constant with some pulsating pain that would increase in intensity. I mentioned it to Jeff about 6/7 weeks postpartum. We didn’t know yet if and how my cancer would react to a pregnancy since there is so little research. Hence why ‘is this cancer’ definitely popped into my head.
In January, the pain was still there but came on very randomly and would go away again after a couple of days. My scans were clean in the abdomen so I figured … nothing to worry about.
The newest drop
Two weeks ago, the pain was back again and this time stayed longer and got more intense. I decided to go see my family doctor. He send me for an ultrasound to see if maybe I had gallstones or something like that. Since that is quite common after pregnancy. Well, I was not really prepared for what he told me when he called me back in.
They had found something suspicious in my liver. It was already quite big 2.4cm to be exact. However they couldn’t tell what exactly it was and recommended a MRI.
Cue the Rollercoaster
Everything from ‘This is nothing. How can it be anything? My scans were clean.’ To ‘This is my cancer spreading to my liver now. What does that mean for treatment? What does that mean for life expectancy? Will Luke have to grow up without me?’
Jeff and I were again forced to have some of the tough conversations about what I e want for Luke. How recovery might look like if I needed surgery. Talking about Jeff taking time off and how that may affect finances. You know… normal stuff for 30 year old’s 
Just over a week after the doctor gave me the news, I was able to get the MRI. As soon as I left the clinic, I called my doctor and booked an appointment for the next day to discuss the results. All the while the Rollercoaster kept going. One minute I would be fine and playing with Luke, the next I would be crying holding him a little tighter wanting this all to go away and just be able to enjoy my baby.
Once I got to my doctor, he told me that they found a benign focal nodular hyperplasic Tumor. Which apparently is the second most common Tumor in livers, however its non cancerous and has a very low chance of becoming cancerous.
Swooosh …. another emotion rolling over me. Relief! So much relief! Thank you God!!
Relief… but what now
Then the next question: ‘Ok so then what’s causing the pain?’ ‘I don’t know. We have done all the tests I can think of. I don’t know.’
Helpful!
I left and called my gastroenterologist (the doctor who does all my gastroscopes for my throat). Left a messages explaining everything not expecting to hear back any time soon since it was end of day for them. About 30 minutes later the phone rings. It’s his assistant. My doctor is away for a while on vacation but as soon as he is back we will see if he can assess me. Since it’s his area of expertise, chances are he will have some more info and some more ideas as to what this is.
The pain is not unbearable. But I have noticed that it was gotten worse. It lasts longer and is slightly more intense. If this continues to be the trend I really hope and pray we can find some answers and maybe treatments to fix this.
Thank you
Thank you to everyone who carried us through these past few weeks. The past almost 5 years!! Your prayers are definitely felt! We are soooo grateful this isn’t cancer rearing it’s ugly head again!
If you are inclined to do so, currently we need prayer to find someone who can figure out what this is. If this will end up needing further treatment, we will also need wisdom as to how to navigate it all with Covid, time off, Luke, finances. Just simply life. Thank you again for supporting us!!
